When you try to control everything, it ends up controlling you

With one look – Μ´Ενα Σου Βλέμμα by Γιοργιος Σαμπανης Giorgios Sabanis and the lyrics https://lyricstranslate.com/en/μ’-ένα-σου-βλέμμα-your-sight.html

Pop music doesn’t usually make videos that makes you think about real world issues but this one was so evocative that I had to watch it again and again to get what it truly was about. The words went too fast for me to read initially so I paused it several times and with the help of Google to make sure I was translating correctly, I managed to get the full gist of things.

The first girl’s story,

I thought I was stronger than food. I could put it in me whenever I wanted but also take it out again. Finally I got what fed me to destroy me….

Νόμιζα ότι είμαι πιο δυνατή από φαγητό. Όποτε θέλω το βάζω μέσα μου, όποτε το βγάζω. Κι έφτασα τελικά ο, τι με τρέφει,να με καταστρέψει …

The first guy’s story

I had a passion for and was addicted to social media. This was the only way that I could cope with my life. But this was not living.

Το πάθος μου κι ο εθισμός μου για την εικονική πραγματικότητα, ήταν ο μόνος τρόπος που είχα για να αντέχω την πραγματικότητα. Αλλά η δειλία δεν είναι ζωή.

The second girl’s story

Sometimes he beats me to show me his love. Afterward he asks for my forgiveness. He tells me that he will change. Eventually I changed.

Καμία φορά με χτυπάει, για να μου δείξει την αγάπη του. Μετά μου ζητάει συγνώμη. Μου λέει θα αλλάζει. Τελικά άλλαζα εγώ.

The second guy’s story

I didn’t care how I made the money. I just did it to ensure I had a good standard of living. The resulting guilt and loneliness made all the victories pyrrhic.

Δε με ένοιαζε ο τρόπος. Μόνο να βγάζω λεφτά για να ζω καλά … Με νίκησαν στα σημεία, η ενοχή και η μοναξιά …

Its a distillation of what it is to be Greek but a modern Greek who is worldly so experiences what everyone else in the world struggles with – Food in the form of Anorexia and Bulimia, Internet addiction, Monetary Greed in the form of being a ruthless and cutthroat business man, Gluttony, Loneliness, Domestic Abuse, Depression and feeling subhuman like you have lost yourself and your humanity.

Best wishes

Angela

The Greek Islands with Julia Bradbury

Since I like to keep up with all things Greek while I’m not there I decided to watch this show. Julia is half Greek in her mothers side from the island of Chios. If you have ever watched her on antiques and art show you would have never guessed this in a million years. I in fact did not know myself until I watched the first episode. It’s nice watching her progress with the Greek language but I wonder why she didn’t take advantage of it in early life.

It’s good to discover your heritage though whatever it is which is why in 2 months time I’m going to India which is where my mother is from. Being English and part of the army she didn’t learn any foreign languages but I think this has more to do with her dyslexia. My dad was also part of the army and learned German but not any other language despite his varied postings. This probably explains my love of travel and culture. Also the fact I don’t stay in one place very long so I never really put down roots or get settled. I was just starting to do that last year and then I had to leave. As usually happens with me.

Do you feel that your life is sometimes so stop/start you struggle to achieve what you think you need out of life?

Best wishes

Angela

Using games to improve your language skills

Just in case you were wondering what happened to the language posts here is one.

I recently went to a birthday party and the guests there were found of using the Sims computer game in foreign languages to learn all of the basic household items. They also liked to play Command and Conquer online with Russian and other eastern block people as it was a good way to learn the language as it was used by the people. My way of naming my Pokemon after Greek animals seemed rather inferior after that. I have thought about changing my devices to foreign languages but that never goes well. I’ve done it by accident and I’ve used items abroad and it’s just too confusing for me. I also came across an Alexa recently so I thought I would see if it could talk to me in foreign languages. This Alexa was new so didn’t seem to be able to even tell me whether she was an Echo, Dot or what version she was. I gave up after asking the same question in 3 different ways and getting the same default responses. So as much as games and technology can help you learn a new language, the best way is always going to be to get out there and to be social as much as you might dislike this method.

Best wishes

Angela

Perception

I’m beginning to think that a lot of the problems that autistics face are based on the perception that others have of us.

Sometimes we are thought of having no drive or ambition when in fact we are perfectly happy with our lives because we have all that we want and value. We are content with a lot less than the average person. We tend not to be materialistic or interested in money. We are almost hippyish or Buddhist in our unattachment to the majority of what the rest of the society thinks we all need to survive. This presents a challenge for relatives of mine every birthday and Christmas. It’s been this way since I was a child and I don’t see it changing. I think it’s a good antidote to today’s capitalist society. It’s also probably why I’m happier in Greece but I’m working on bringing the focus back to the uk even if I don’t have the weather!

Another factor is our honesty. Yes it’s uncomfortable to be the recipient of one of our remarks but comedians ‘roast’ celebrities on a regular basis and it’s prime time television. We also remark on our children saying things with such fierce truthfulness that we lost long ago. Children are not trying to please anyone or curry favour with their speeches. They just say it as they see it and it’s our reaction this this raw authenticity that catches us off guard as we have become so used to the sugar coating and lies of the adult world.

Authority is another area we struggle with. We are capable of obeying orders just like everyone else but often we don’t see why we should. Just being told to do something often makes us defiant. We need to be told the reasoning for the request for us to understand its importance. We don’t tend to blindly follow orders especially if they seem illogical to us. We are not sheep as we think for ourselves. An explanation is usually enough for us to comply with a task.

So drive and ambition, honesty, authority and the The secrets of Small talk for autistics are all factors that make us different but with a few adjustments mean we can fit into society just like everyone else.

Best wishes

Angela

Personality Dominance

It’s very interesting to see how I interact with people once the initial awkwardness has passed by.

At first I was half asleep since I don’t function well socially in the morning. As they all knew each other as well I didn’t know how to enter the conversation either. When I meet people I’m too busy reading their vibes and absorbing who they are to be able to talk to anyone, about anything, in the first 10-15 minutes. This doesn’t tend to bode well. I think the fact I learn about people through my senses rather than spoken words makes it more authentic for me. However it frightens others as I’m seeing them for who they really are rather than who they are trying to make themselves out to be.

I go through this linguistic awkwardness every Sunday evening in Greece even though I’ve been doing that for years. It hasn’t so far got any better but I need more practice with the conversational aspects of the language and better emotional and impulse control. This may allow me to progress.

Yesterday it worked out well that we all then went to see a movie. Afterwards there was then something to talk about. Icebreakers are what I struggle with. I’ve had to learn to be comfortable in my own skin to get along with others. It’s nice though when I don’t sense any animosity from others. Most people have too much energy swirling around them so it can be quite exhausting for me.

I found this afternoon that since we were in a restaurant and action needed to be taken about what we were having that I tried to take charge like my parents would for me. I can be quite decisive since I’m generally quite opinionated but I don’t want to come across as rude, arrogant and selfish. I also don’t wish to offend others by overtaking things and not letting them have a say in matters like my parents would dictate to me. In the past I couldn’t make a decision quick enough as there was too much to think about as I didn’t get enough practice. This comes out when I’m asked a question and my default answer before I’ve even thought about it is “I don’t know”. It’s at this point that people lose interest in me and I’ve lost my chance to contribute to the conversation on that topic.

Again it’s interesting that I can command others attention when I’m speaking as I’m not used to that. Although it may be that they are straining to hear me since I’m so quiet usually, or that they are struggling to understand my accent and are too polite to mention this. It’s difficult to know with people you have just met.

I’m also glad to have learnt about myself while traveling the world since I now have plenty to talk about but I find that there is truly no place like home as Dorothy says.

Best wishes

Angela

There is a Berlin Wall inside my brain for words

This was installed when I had my accident at 17 and they are very militant in not allowing words from one part of my brain to the other. I learn all the words of a language and retain them but they are not allowed to cross the divide between the conscious and unconscious minds.

My husband just made a joke in Greek which was quite funny. He was saying a bunch of stuff then he says vemata (steps) instead of psmeta (lies) excuse my spelling. So I’m thinking there not the same word and that’s not the word he means or even what he usually says. Then I get what it is he just said so the words are there, there just not allowed out of the fortress often.

I have to find my Reagan so he can say “Tear down this wall Mr Gorbachev!”

Best wishes

Angela

Telling tales in Greek

For Christmas I got this book. It is a children’s book to help English speakers learn the Greek language. It is the tale of the Odyssey and Odysseus. However the Greek that is taught in this book is the original Ancient Greek. This means extra learning of words that they no longer use. It’s interesting looking at the origins of the language though. Some words however remain the same.

The best part of this book is it’s focus on grammar including the most difficult point I have come across so far – the genitive sandwich.

This is very difficult for an English speaker because we don’t really have cases, declension or even gender in our language anymore. We therefore don’t ever need to worry about genderised conjugation or even really conjugating.

English is a hodgepodge of rules that have been adopted from all of the different invaders. This makes it a difficult language to learn because it’s not as pure as older languages are. You do however get compensated by having many cognates with other newer languages.

Another reason for the inherent difficulty in processing Greek from an English speakers perspective stems from the genitive case being the one that you use to indicate possession. In our enlightened times we wouldn’t ever think of saying ‘of Daniel’ to indicate that something belongs to Daniel unless we were referencing The Handmaid’s Tale. It’s anti feminist and very archaic to think in terms like this.

Grammar wasn’t taught much in schools when I was attending in contrast to previous eras. I believe they have changed that now with an emphasis on more exotic foreign languages like Mandarin instead of just European. This means that today’s school children are better equipped to handle the linguistic diversity that is present in the world. At least in my opinion.

Best wishes

Angela

Ebooks vs real books vs audio books

This is an interesting conundrum as there are positives and negatives for all sides. I have addressed this previously in my books here on My author page. I have also written several articles about reading – Different types of Reading, The to be read pile etc. As it’s such an essential skill there is always more to examine so, today I’m going to delve into what happens when I read an ebook as opposed to the real version and add in a little about audiobooks too.

When I had a Kindle and started reading the e versions of books as it was too expensive for me to continually buy the real versions I noticed that I wasn’t enjoying them as much. I’m not one of those that particularly goes in for the smell of old books, the feel of the paper, the weight of the book or the cover design but the fact you can disconnect from the digital world is brilliant. This doesn’t happen if you have stopped working using a screen but progressed to reading using a screen. The book may be fiction and it may be an author or subject you really enjoy but the electric light interferes. Your not relaxed because the photons don’t allow that. You also can’t go to sleep reading an ebook as the light does the opposite in keeping you awake.

I used to think that the reasons I didn’t finish books was because of the style, subject matter, author but the format also has some input into my overall enjoyment. I read the paperback version of Organised Mind by Daniel Levitin. Or tried to read it as I should say because although it’s a very interesting book it was like trying to walk through a quagmire. I gave up. Then I come across the book on Blinkist. I read it very quickly as with all books on there because there designed like that. However, to me it didn’t feel like I was reading the same book at at all. It was summarised so it had all the salient details but as far as I know, by someone else. Therefore, to me, it doesn’t have any of the authors insight or stamp on it. It’s just a collection of words that teach you something, albeit better than the original, but bearing little resemblance to it. I’m really starting to dislike abridged versions of books.

I remember listening to a Jane Austen audiobook and it was enjoyable but since it was abridged it skipped out a lot. Sometimes when traveling my attention is diverted elsewhere so I lose the thread of the story and I found this happening frequently. I think I need all that extra information to keep my focus as it’s a bygone era.

I don’t like listening to audiobooks much as I have sensitive hearing that seems to be affecting me more than when I was younger. I could however just be noticing it more. I know alcohol dampens the senses but it’s not good to use that to cope with noisy situations. Anyways I find I pay less attention to an audiobook but it’s more relaxing that way as I can just switch off.

So in conclusion Real Books are best for absorbing information information, e books if you want a wide variety that doesn’t take up any space and audiobooks if you need a distraction from every day life.

Do you agree with my conclusion?

Best wishes

Angela

Ubiquitous words

Uber is one of those words that is now universally known as the car firm that you can call up anywhere, anytime and you will get a cab to take you any place you like. It has had a couple of changes though from its German meaning. When it first came to my attention in English it was being used to be mean ultra or exceptional as it was a foreign word to most who didn’t know what it meant so it was special and therefore it could mean anything in advertising terms. In German I learnt that it was just a lowly common garden variety word meaning above as in uber teche being a simple phrase saying above the table.

Kinder Bueno is an unusual word as it combines German and Spanish. Kinder is German for children and Bueno Spanish for good yet it enabled me to make a funny joke about my husband being a good child that’s why he got a kinder bueno ice cream without him getting the joke whatsoever. Another marketing joke that most I don’t expect realise as to them it’s just a chocolate bar.

Mojo is another phrase popularised through its use in the Austin Powers Austin’s mojo movies of the 1990’s. This one may have jumped onto the Spanish bandwagon as that language was popular in songs later on in the decade especially. Mojo as defined by Austin was his sexual energy had been stolen so he could no longer woo women. In reality mojo is just the word for sauce although most of us would recognise salsa for sauce instead.

Adelante is another 90’s word that got its spot in the sunlight through the hugely popular Sash Sash – adelante song of the same name. It was rave culture and dancing under the influence of drugs means you are unlikely to care what the song is about since the beat and rhythm is more important. Club music is often stripped back to the bones and this song invites you to come on in. However if you don’t know Spanish you might never twig that adelante means precisely that.

Have you got any examples of your own to share with me? If so drop me a line in the comments section.

Best wishes

Angela

How the letters of the alphabet got their names – The Economist explains

Why B became bee and U became yoo
— Read on www.economist.com/the-economist-explains/2017/11/14/how-the-letters-of-the-alphabet-got-their-names

If your curious like I am this is a good article to read as it explains curiosities like the lack of j in Spanish and the h sound.